|
|
Life expectancy has grown dramatically over the last century, but not all those living longer are living well. But it’s never too late to make behavior changes and get preventive screenings to help you live a better and longer life.
Behavior
* Be tobacco free. To talk to someone about how, call the National Quitline at 1-800-QUITNOW.
* Get active. Start small and work up to 30 minutes or more of moderate activity several days a week. Talk to your doctor first.
* Eat healthy. Lean meats, fish, vegetables, fruits, whole grains and fat free or low fat milk products are best.
* Get immunized. The right immunizations can prevent not only the flu and pneumonia, but whooping cough and shingles as well.
*
Screenings
Screening tests help check for problems before symptoms are apparent. Health experts recommend the following screenings for anyone over age 50:
* Colorectal Cancer
* Depression
* High Blood Pressure
* High Cholesterol
Women over age 50 should have the following screenings as well:
* Breast Cancer
* Cervical Cancer
Check with your doctor about what screenings you should have. Targeted screenings based on age, gender, underlying health condition or family history can make all the difference for a healthy life.
According to the National Institutes of Health (NIH), exercise and physical activity are some of the best things older adults can do to stay healthy. Even moderate exercise can improve the health of those who are frail or who have age-related diseases.
Some seniors are concerned that physical activity or exercise may be too strenuous or may do them more harm than good. In fact, it’s an inactive lifestyle that proves to do more harm than exercise does.
Without physical activity, older people tend to grow weaker in four areas important for staying healthy and independent: strength, balance, flexibility, and endurance. The NIH maintains that:
- Increasing strength and endurance make it easier to climb stairs and carry groceries.
- Improving balance helps prevent falls.
- Being more flexible may speed recovery from injuries.
Exercising regularly can also have a positive impact on the immune system, blood pressure, cardiovascular system and it can decrease the risk of heart disease and help with depression or anxiety.
The American Senior Fitness Association has some recommendations for those wanting to start a fitness program.
- Get medical clearance to exercise.
- Don’t exercise if you are injured, sick, or running a temperature.
- Always warm up and always cool down.
- Drink plenty of water before, during and after exercise.
- Avoid heavy meals for about two hours before energetic exercise.
- If fatigue and/or discomfort last longer than one or two hours after exercising, cut back the next day but don’t stop completely. Comfort ranges can change daily, so don’t get discouraged if you can’t do the same amount of exercise as you did the day before.
- Concentrate on exercises that improve and maintain your range of motion, lubricate the joints and keep muscles flexible. Everyday activities will be easier to carry out and you’ll have less pain, too.
Stop exercise and consult your physician immediately if you experience any of the following:
- chest pain or tightness in the chest, neck or throat
- considerable difficulty breathing
- abnormal heart rhythm; nausea’ dizziness, light headedness, or visual interruption
- excessive cold sweat
- extreme or lasting weakness or fatigue
For a good, overall exercise program, consider tai chi. Tai chi is a self-paced system of gentle physical exercise. It involves standing and performing a series of movements in a slow, graceful way. Each movement smoothly flows into the next. Studies suggest that tai chi may improve balance and knee joint stability, both of which help balance.
Staying active does the body and the mind a world of good. Find exercise and activities that you enjoy and you’ll be able to stick with it and improve your quality of life.
Twenty million American adults are caring for aging parents at the same time they’re raising young children. Known as the Sandwich Generation, they are feeling the stress.
A recent study of “sandwichers” reports that:
- 53 percent feel forced to choose between caring for their children or caring for their parents at least once a week
- 20 percent feel they must choose to care for one or the other every day of the week
The American Psychological Association’s 2007 Stress in America survey found that mothers in the sandwich generation, ages 35 – 54, feel more stress than any other age group as they try to manage caring for growing children and aging parents.
The pressures of taking care of family members, as well as the worry over parents’ health, putting children through college and saving for retirement takes a big toll. So what’s a sandwicher to do?
Involve the whole family
It’s common for one family member to assume responsibility for older parents. But even the most take-charge, organized person will need help.
Getting siblings and other immediate family involved lightens the burden for everyone, and gives them a chance to show their love for parents, too.
Establish regular family meetings for those involved in providing care. Those that can’t be there in person can participate by phone or Web-cam.
- Keep a list of updates and concerns about health, finances, legal or housing issues.
- Talk about problems that may have come up with giving or getting help. Discussing such issues helps avoid hurt feelings and gets problems solved.
- Focus on the task of caring for the parent, not dealing with old family hurts.
Find a job for everyone. A brother who lives far away can still help with paying bills, researching agencies, or just calling regularly. A sister who lives nearby but who can’t give regular care may be the designated back-up for the primary care giver.
It’s important to get your spouse and children involved, too.
- Be specific about how your spouse can help, and make sure that you ask for help, not demand it.
- Check in with your spouse about his or her feelings and encourage them to talk.
- Be honest with your children about the situation. Answer their questions.
- Ask them how they’d like to help out. Perhaps they’d like to make cards or show off their newest treasures.
Get outside help
- Community groups and churches often have volunteers who can help with home repair, transportation, meals and companionship.
- Talk to those who see your parents regularly – delivery people, beauticians, barbers or neighbors – and ask them to call you if anything seems out of the ordinary.
- Look to professional care services when your parent’s physical needs are too much for you to handle.
It’s also important to take care of yourself. Make time to rest, eat right and relax. You’re no good to anyone in your family if you’re exhausted and stressed out.
Caring for two generations at the same time isn’t easy, but it can be managed – if you get some help.
B-O-O Brownie Pops
Halloween Goldfish Munch
Happy Haunted House
(Family Features) – The bewitching season is here! Gather the goblins, conjure up some creative costumes and prepare scary, scrumptious sweets for a great ghostly gathering.
Making these frighteningly fabulous party treats together is a perfect way for mom and the kids to share some spooktacular fun.
- Cast a spell right from the start with a Happy Haunted House. Begin with a ready-to-decorate Halloween Cookie House Kit available at craft and hobby stores. The house is pre-assembled; just decorate and enjoy!
- Sweetly smiling Goldfish Grahams do double duty as both roofing “tiles” and a wholesome snack (they’re made with whole grains, without artificial preservatives). Kids can affix the Goldfish crackers to the roof after it’s been iced (and enjoy snacking on them as they work), making sure to give equal representation to each flavor: cinnamon, honey and chocolate. The sparkling blue piping gel moat and pond need to be stocked with Goldfish, too. Complete the decorating with green coconut grass, a candy corn fence plus the icings and the candies that come with the kit.
- B-O-O Pops are easy … nothing sinister here! Use a brownie mix for convenience and bake in the Brownie Pop Silicone Mold to ensure perfect pops. The kids can insert the lollipop sticks, then dip pops into the colorful Candy Melts. Decorating sprinkles and sugars add the finishing flourish.
- Halloween Goldfish Munch is a snappy party snack or a tantalizing take-away for ghoulish guests. Kids can mix the Goldfish crackers (graham and pretzel flavors), with nuts and dried fruits while Mom melts the Spooky Green Candy for drizzling.
Add favorite beverages and let the spookalicious party begin!
For additional information about Goldfish Grahams, recipes and nutrition information, visit www.pepperidgefarm.com.
Find more ways to bake, decorate and celebrate, or order the Halloween Cookie House Kit at www.wilton.com.
B-O-O Brownie Pops
Ingredients
- 1 package (about 16 ounces) brownie mix (8 x 8-inch size)
- Egg, water and oil to prepare mix
- 48 lollipop sticks
- Wilton Orange, Spooky Green and Light Cocoa Candy Melts
- Wilton Spider Mix, Hallow Pumpkin Mix, Halloween Nonpareil Sprinkles, and Orange, Black and Lavender Sugars, as desired
Preparation
- Preheat oven to 350°F. Spray brownie pop mold with vegetable pan spray; place on cookie sheet.
- Prepare brownie mix following package directions. Spoon batter into prepared brownie pop mold, filling cavities 2/3 full. Bake 15 minutes. Remove mold from oven; insert lollipop sticks. Return to oven and continue baking 10 to 15 minutes or until brownies test done. Cool brownies in mold on cooling grid 20 minutes; remove from mold and cool completely.
- Melt each color candy following package instructions. Dip cooled pops into melted candy, covering completely. While the candy is still soft, sprinkle with or dip pops into sprinkles and sugars. Place on parchment paper to set.
Serves
Makes 48 pops
Notes, Tips & Suggestions
Note: If desired, bake brownies completely without inserting stick. After brownies have cooled, dip lollipop sticks into melted candy and insert into either end of brownie. Let set before decorating.
Halloween Goldfish Munch
Ingredients
- 3 packages (6.6 ounces each) Pepperidge Farm Cinnamon, Chocolate or Honey Goldfish Grahams (or any combination)
- 1 package (8 ounces) Pepperidge Farm Pretzel Goldfish Snack Crackers
- 1 can (10 ounces) salted mixed nuts
- 1 cup chopped dried apricots
- 1 cup golden raisins
- 2 packages (10 ounces each) Wilton
- Spooky Green Candy Melts
Preparation
- In large bowl, combine crackers, nuts, apricots and raisins; divide between 2 large cookie pans.
- Melt candy following package directions; drizzle over snack mixture. Refrigerate until firm.
- Break apart and store in airtight container until ready to serve.
Serves
Makes about 14 cups treat mix
Happy Haunted House
Ingredients
- Wilton Halloween Cookie House Kit
- 10 x 14-inch cake board
- Cornstarch
- Pepperidge Farm Cinnamon, Chocolate and Honey Goldfish Grahams
- Wilton Piping Gel
- Wilton Royal Blue and Kelly Green Icing Colors
- Flaked coconut
- Candy corn
Preparation
- Prepare icing mixes following instructions. Attach house to cake board.
- Outline door with black icing; attach candy dots. Outline door window in black icing; fill in with orange icing and smooth with finger dipped in cornstarch.
- Outline windows with black icing; add orange icing accents. Attach candy dot window sills.
- Spatula ice roof; attach crackers to roof with dots of icing. Decorate house eaves with jelly beans attached with dots of icing. Add orange outline to roof peaks; attach candy dots.
- Tint portion of piping gel blue; spatula blue gel “moat” and “pond” on cake board; arrange crackers in the water. Brush clear piping gel onto open areas of cake board; sprinkle with green-tinted coconut. Arrange candy corn around house with dots of icing.
(Family Features) – Not sure what to get the gadget-lover in your life? This quick gadget guide will give you the scoop on what to look for so you can spread some holiday cheer.
E-book Reader
What it is: A small, portable device that lets you download entire books, newspapers and magazines in digital format. Made to mimic ink and paper publications, you can read with ease any time, anywhere. You’ll find a range of prices and services with Sony Reader, Amazon Kindle, Cool-er, iRex iLiad and Bookeen Cybook.
What to look for: Long battery life and an easy to read screen. The reader should be easy to carry and must be readable even in bright sunlight. Note that some e-readers must download materials by being connected to a computer, while others can do it wirelessly. Think about loading a few of the recipient’s must-read books onto the reader as an added surprise.
Who to buy it for: Travelers, gadget-lovers, busy book lovers.
Cell Phone Signal Booster
What it is: A small electronic device that reduces dropped calls and improves cell phone signal by capturing the stronger signal from the outside and amplifying the signal indoors. According to the zBoost “State of the Cell Signal” survey, 70 percent of cell phone owners experience problems with cell phone service, including dropped calls, poor signal reception or dead zones in their homes. A signal booster, like zBoost, can make those problems a thing of the past, as well as increase signal and speed of aircards, EDGE and 3G technology.
What to look for: Make sure the signal booster meets the needs of the intended user. Think about:
- How much mobility will they need – will they be working at their desk or within a larger area?
- How many phones or devices need signal boosting, one or several?
- Where does the reception need to be improved, indoors or in a vehicle? The zBoost-ONE PCS, for example, is a the industry’s first one piece cell phone signal booster. It works with PCS carriers like Sprint or Metro PCS. Place the unit in the window, plug it in and enjoy all of the voice and data functionality on a PCS phone up to 1200 square feet.
- For more cell phone signal booster options, visit www.wi-ex.com.
Who to buy it for: Road warriors, home office workers, rural or urban dwellers.
Bluetooth Headset
What it is: A wireless headset that lets you talk on the phone hands-free. You can find headsets from $20 and up.
What to look for:
- Make sure the headset runs the same version of Bluetooth that the user’s phone does.
- If they wear glasses, look at in-ear headsets rather than those that go over the ears – glasses and a headset can get cumbersome.
- For extra clarity, consider a headset with a boom microphone – one that extends from the headset toward the mouth.
- Headsets with good noise cancellation can make conversing in busy, noisy areas a lot easier.
Who to buy it for: Phone fanatics, road warriors.
Pocket Camcorder
What it is: A pocket-sized digital video recorder that can go anywhere, making it easy to record events and special moments. Video is usually very easy to download to computers and the Web. Camcorders such as Flip from Pure Digital, Kodak’s Zx1 and Creative’s Vado are affordable options.
What to look for:
- Resolution – Digital camcorders come in standard definition and high definition (HD). Standard definition offers video quality fine for viewing on a computer or a non-HD TV, and will usually cost less than HD. High definition produces wide-screen video suitable for viewing on an HD TV.
- Think about how the recipient will be using it and then consider options such as image stabilization, audio recording and photo features, which let it be used like a digital camera.
Who to buy it for: Proud parents, college students, travelers.
Something for Everyone on Your List
Mobile Mom
Upgrade mom’s cell phone to a smart phone to help her manage family life with ease. If a smart phone isn’t in the budget, but she still needs a way to connect while on the move, look into a personal mobile email device, such as a Peek Pronto, that lets her text and send emails from anywhere.
Digital Dad
Forget socks and ties. Get him something that will help him stay in touch while at work, on the road, at the ball field or at home – a zBoost cell phone signal booster will let him get calls, texts, emails and pictures no matter where he is.
Road Warrior
Know someone who’s on the road all the time? Make their drive easier with a GPS, more pleasant with a satellite radio subscription or safer with hands-free phone accessories.
Gadget Chick
According to the recent “Women & Digital Life” study conducted by the Solutions Research Group, when women were asked if technology was a “guy thing” – an overwhelming 77 percent replied that it was not! Get your gadget girl a netbook, pocket camcorder or an e-book reader to keep her geared up and on the go.
SOURCE:
zBoost
Easy (and affordable) ways to unwind
(Family Features) – Women across the country are meeting the demands of busy schedules and tightened wallets by setting aside life’s simple pleasures and putting themselves at the bottom of the to-do list.
In fact, a new survey commissioned by the makers of Edwards frozen desserts finds more than nine in 10 American women have cut back on indulgences during the past year.
Fifty-nine percent of survey respondents are cutting back on events out with friends and more than one-third (35 percent) are cutting back on even the smallest treats, such as manicures and desserts.
The survey also found that:
- Nearly all (94 percent) American women in the study admit that they don’t indulge or treat themselves as often as they’d like because other people or commitments come first.
- Fifty-six percent of women say they don’t treat themselves as often as they’d like because they can’t afford to.
- Nearly a third (32 percent) of women say they now have less free time for themselves than they did a year ago.
Small rewards offer sweet peace of mind
Heather Reider and Mary Goulet, founders of MomsTown.com and hosts of MomsTown Radio, know a thing or two about the challenges of juggling a family and career while making the time to treat themselves.
“Self-pampering may seem like the last thing on your mind these days, but treating yourself to something special is so critical to relieving the stress of every day life,” says Reider.
“A personal treat does not have to break the bank and can be as simple as an at-home facial or sneaking a dessert in at the end of the day,” adds Goulet.
Reider and Goulet share these tips and strategies for effortless and affordable ways to celebrate everyday indulgences.
The silent treatment
In today’s age of technology, the silent treatment is imperative to maintain sanity. Home phones, cell phones, email, instant messaging, pagers, not to mention the multiple ways you get pinged when you turn on the computer, can all be overwhelming. Get serious about your silent treatment and power off the technology. Turn off the ringer on all phones, shut down the computer, and turn off the television and the radio. Now it’s time for a 15 to 30 minute scheduled time out because you deserve a little peace and quiet.
Bring nature indoors
A great way to nurture yourself is to bring nature indoors. You can do this simply by cultivating a container garden. This could be a window box, urn, basket or round fish bowl. For a fabulous display of nature indoors use a Bonsai plant, an orchid, a robust green plant, herbs or layer two different kinds of tulips. This is especially good for chilly winter months as floral aromas and popping colors can brighten a dark day.
The flip side
Pamper yourself by flipping to the right side of your brain. Engaging in art and creative pursuits fires-up the right side of your brain, which is the side of the brain that savors freedom. The left side of your brain is good when you need to pay the bills or figure out your kids’ 5th grade math problem. Spend a little time painting, drawing, making jewelry or knitting. You deserve to play on the flip side.
Back to basics
It’s hard to do but it is important to put yourself at the top of the to-do list every once in a while. Simple indulgences, like an Edwards Singles Á La Modes dessert, are a quick and easy way to treat yourself to something sweet, as well as fill your kitchen with a delicious home-baked aroma.
Essential essence
Treat yourself to the power of fragrance. Aromatherapy sachets placed in drawers are a sensational way to feel good without having to do or spend much at all. If you’re looking for an energizing scent try citrus, peppermint or bergamot. To take the stress down a few notches choose lavender, chamomile, sandalwood or ylang-ylang. You deserve to tickle your nose.
Budding beauty
Invest in four to six bud vases or use any vase that’s lying around your house. Go to your local farmer’s market or grocery store and buy a bouquet of flowers. When you get home, break the flower bunch apart into single stems and place the flowers in the bud vases. Distribute these vases around the house in the rooms you visit most frequently. Place one by the kitchen sink, the vanity in your bathroom, on your nightstand, in the powder room and in your kids’ bedrooms. You’ll be amazed at how your kids will appreciate the gesture. Then when you walk around your home you’ll be greeted with flowers wherever you go. And you did it with just one bouquet.
Hit your funny bone
When it comes to our emotions it’s really hard to multi-task. It’s nearly impossible to be sad and exuberant in the same exact moment. You deserve to laugh so choose more moments to get a giggle in your day. Read something funny or rent a funny movie.
While life is full of stressful moments, the benefits of taking time to rejuvenate and unwind really can make a difference.
For more information on Edwards Singles Á La Modes desserts, visit EdwardsBaking.com.
(Family Features) – For anyone with children or teenagers in the house, it’s no surprise that being online is the in thing to do. According to research studies conducted by The Nielson Company, approximately 16 million U.S. children ages two to 11 are active online. This shows an 18 percent increase over the past five years, while the overall Internet population only increased usage by 10 percent. Furthermore, the amount of time children spend online is 63 percent higher than just five years ago.
One problem that falls under the umbrella of Internet safety that children may face when they’re online, is cyberbullying. A cyberbully is a minor who uses the Internet, phone or other digital device to post hurtful messages or images to another minor.
Parry Aftab, executive director of the charity that runs StopCyberbullying.org says, “They do it by posing as each other, stealing or misusing their passwords, stealing points in online games. They call each other names, or send offensive messages to their friends while impersonating them. They even take embarrassing pictures of others and post them online.”
Cyberbullying affects children as young as seven and up through high school. According to a yearlong survey of students in the U.S. and Canada conducted by Aftab, results showed that:
- Cyberbullying starts as early as third grade, peaks in fourth grade and again in seventh and eighth grade.
- 75 percent of teens reported cyberbullying someone else and 85 percent of students reported they had been targeted at least once in the past year.
When kids are still in grammar school, the direct attacks usually consist of making fun of each other and testing limits. In middle school, cyberbullies attack classmates’ reputations and it can escalate from there as children move into high school.
What Can Parents Do?
Aftab recommends open communication between parents and children. “Encourage discussions about what they enjoy online,” she says. “This way you can direct your children to safe sites that fit their interests and it helps your children know you want an active role in their life.”
It’s important to make sure that your children feel comfortable coming to you with questions. This should apply to all situations including the computer. If your children feel they can trust you, they are more likely to come to you with tough problems and questions. A survey by WiredSafety found that only 5 percent of middle schoolers would tell their parents if they were cyberbullied, and that they have identified more than 50 different reasons not to tell their parents.
If your child is the victim of cyberbullying, the most important thing parents can do, says Aftab, is to give them a hug. “Tell them you love them and how sorry you are that they were hurt. Let them know that the cyberbully is not the boss of them. And promise not to overreact and take away the technology or call the school, the other parents or the media and make things worse.”
The most important thing parents can do to protect children is to monitor computer and Internet usage. “Knowing you are watching, kids are less likely to put themselves in risky situations and you can safely oversee negative or dangerous behaviors,” says Aftab.
What Should Kids Do?
As part of its online community at buildabearville.com, Build-A-Bear Workshop promotes safety tips for kids that can be applied to any online experience.
Stop, Block and Tell
If someone is cyberbullying or trying to get personal information, Stop talking to them, Block them from talking to you and Tell a trusted adult.
Aftab also says, “To help them keep a healthy perspective they should ‘Take 5’ when something or someone upsets them online. That means they should do something they love offline for five minutes to help calm down and not do anything they will regret.”
Password Protection
- Passwords should be easy to remember, hard to guess. If your kids have to write it down, it’s too hard to remember. If it’s a pet’s name, their middle name, their favorite sports team, etc., it’s too easy to guess. Sit down with your kids and talk about ideas for a password, and remember a combination of numbers and letters is always best.
- Don’t allow kids to give out their password to others. 85 percent of elementary school students and 70 percent of teens polled said they shared their password with at least one friend. That’s one friend too many!
- Friends can be cyberbullies too, signing onto your child’s account, impersonating them and possibly embarrassing them. They can also change your child’s password, locking them out of their account.
For more cybersafety tips, visit WiredSafety.org or WiredKids.org. For a fun and safe place for kids to play online, visit buildabearville.com.
Get Involved
Build-A-Bear Workshop encourages kids and adults to get involved in making the Internet a safer place. Build-A-Bearville recently became one of the first to earn the Socially Safe Kids Seal, reserved for the sites whose moderators and game designers have all been trained on Internet safety and cyberbullying.
In addition to having suggested tips and resources for parents and kids available at buildabearville.com, the company has also incorporated the importance of safe play into their online play experience. Citizens of Build-A-Bearville are encouraged to take an Online Safety Quiz to receive a special hat for their avatar. They are also reminded of online safety tips in the Bearville Times, the site’s weekly newspaper.
Build-A-Bear Workshop also recognizes kids for being good citizens in the online world. Their Jr. CyBearGuide program allows qualified kid citizens of Build-A-Bearville to act as guides by answering questions, providing information and even giving tours. If you or your child is interested in becoming a Jr. CyBearGuide member, visit Bear University in Build-A-Bearville. Click the paw under the big Jr. CyBearGuide blue star to learn more about the program.
Online Safety Guidelines for Parents
Parry Aftab of WiredKids.org has additional tips to help keep kids safe online.
- Personal information stays personal. While this is an important rule for children it’s also an important rule for parents. Giving information on your family and your children to the wrong person can be dangerous.
- Make sure your child doesn’t spend all of his or her time on the computer. Other kids, not computers, should be their best friends and companions.
- Remember to monitor their compliance with safety rules, especially when it comes to the amount of time children spend on the computer.
- Warn them that people may not be what they seem to be. The Internet provides a cover for people to put on whatever personas they desire.
Here is the short list of updates for fall 2009
The Family Home Page
* Your Family Home Page now supports “Drag and Drop”. Each family member can re-arrange the blocks of content on the home page. Content areas can even be hidden.
Using this new feature is easy, just click on a block and while holding down the mouse drag the block to its new location. To delete a block click the header and then click the red X. Made a mistake? Use the Quick Links area to find the “Reset Default” button.
Family Videos
* FamilyCrossings.com now has a new section for sharing videos. This area functions very much like YouTube.com. You can upload video files in the following formats .wmv, .avi, .mov, .qt, .mpeg, .mpg, .mp4, .flv. File uploads should be NOT be larger than 75 MB. When the file has completed the upload process our software will automatically convert it into a Flash file and the original video clip will be deleted to save you storage space. Please remember to keep the original file on your computer. Don’t forget to add Crossings that contain search words and geo tags. The three most recent videos will be displayed on your home page.
Photo Galleries
* We added the ability to re-order the sequence in which photos appear in a gallery. Click on “Edit Gallery” and then drag the image into the new order. Select “Save” when you are finished.
* The “Edit Gallery” area includes Photo Album Covers controls that allow you decide which photo to use as an anchor image when viewing all the albums.
News Digest
* We also added a weekly email News Digest to your family website. Every week FamilyCrossings.com will send an email to your family letting them know about upcoming events, birthdays and see links to new content that was recently added. As an Administrator for your family you will need to log in, click on Administration, click on the link “Site News Digest”, check the box enable to enable this new feature for your family. By default all your family members will then have the News Digest delivered to their registered email address. Each family member can option out of this feature by clicking on “My Settings” and de-selecting Yes, I want to receive the weekly E-mail Digest of Your Family Site news.
(Family Crossings) – Stomach aches, headaches, sleep problems, poor concentration, moodiness, irritability, racing thoughts…Getting married is supposed to be a happy time, right? So why are so many brides-to-be completely stressed out?
Having to take care of endless details, manage vendors, handle family demands and meet the emotional needs of the groom – and fitting it all into an already busy schedule – can turn any sweet-natured woman into either a blubbering mess or the dreaded bridezilla.
Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be that way. Wedding consultants and planning experts agree that there are some ways to manage the stress and make the planning process more enjoyable for everyone involved.
Expect stress. If you accept the fact that this is a stressful time, you can let go of guilt about it and take some precautionary measures to deal with it. Talk with your fiancé and a close friend about helping you chill out when things get too tense. Come up with a non-judgmental code word they can say to let you know it’s time for a break. When you hear the code word, stop, take a deep breath and then set the planning aside for a while and do something non-wedding related.
Be realistic. A lot of brides set their expectations so high that they drive themselves (and everyone around them) crazy trying to meet them. But unless you have unlimited access to money, you’re going to have to adjust some of your plans. There are a lot of resources (Web sites, books, magazines, friends) that can help you pull off a lovely wedding on whatever budget you have.
Don’t try to please everyone. It’s just not possible. Nor is it reasonable to try. The wedding is about the bride and groom. You two need to decide what is meaningful to you and what will express who you are. If his mother wants Cousin Jennie to play her bagpipe as you march down the aisle and you don’t care for the idea, it’s ok to say no. Come up with a polite response such as, “Thanks for your suggestion, but we’re going in a different direction with the plans.” Feelings may get bruised, but ultimately it’s your day and it only has to please you and your fiancé.
Delegate, delegate, delegate. No matter how capable you are, no matter how nifty your organizer is, you can’t do everything by yourself. Nor should you, so stop feeling guilty. It’s ok to ask friends, family and the groom for help – as long as you do it nicely. Some churches or reception halls have a wedding coordinator available to help with details. They’ve done this hundreds of times – you haven’t. Use them!
Take care of yourself. It’s always important to eat right, get enough sleep and exercise, but it’s especially important during times of stress. You’ll feel more energized, you’ll be able to think more clearly and make better decisions. Besides, who wants to see a bride with dark circles under her eyes drag herself down the aisle?
Keep things in perspective. The most important thing to remember is that the wedding is only a one-day event. It’s just a party to celebrate the beginning of a life together. Too many brides feel enormous pressure to make the wedding perfect and they forget about building a solid marriage. Don’t lose yourself in the details of this one day. You have a lifetime of new memories to create, this is only one of them.
How to Have a Fabulous Wedding for Less (Family Crossings) – The average wedding in America costs around $29,000, according to The Wedding Report, Inc., a wedding industry research company. Not surprisingly, couples are looking for ways to save money on their special day.
Here are some ideas to help you have a wonderful wedding on a budget.
The Date. Having a wedding on off-peak months and days can be a bargain. November through April are slower months for weddings, so many halls, caterers and other service providers give discounts because they have fewer bookings. Some will also have discounts for weddings held on any day other than Saturday.
Continue reading Brides on a Budget
|
